Tuesday, May 13, 2014

How Not to Be Cool at AVA

A huge new luxury apartment building called AVA has just opened at 55 Ninth Street, across the street from the old Furniture Mart which has been reconfigured as the new Twitter headquarters. Rents for one-bedroom apartments start at about $3,400 a month, and go up from there. According to their website, it is a smoke-free building but dogs, even big ones, are allowed.

New signage has recently appeared on their front doors which reads almost as a parody of the New Digerati Web 2.0 Gold Rush.

The casual usage of "awesome" is silly enough, but to use "not cool" as an injunction against solicitation and the dropping off of published material takes us to a new level of absurdity, especially in a neighborhood filled with street people who are not particularly concerned with what is cool or not.


Patrick J. Vaz said...

I only wish they had asked the street people to "chillax."

Civic Center said...

Dear Patrick: I had to look up "chillax" up on the Urban Slang Dictionary, but you're absolutely correct. For true awesomeness, they needed to invoke The Chillax Injunction (the new postmortem Robert Ludlum thriller coming to an airport bookstore near you).

Patrick J. Vaz said...

I can only describe your idea for The Chillax Injunction as AWESOME, and I mean 24/7 AWESOME.

Hattie said...

Dogs allowed. How about hot dogs?
Man if there were not so much money involved I would think of this endeavor as the ultimate nonsense.